Galations 5:22-24

This is just going to be a rambling post I am sure. But I just need to pour out my heart somewhere. I tried with a friend & my hubby yesterday but I am still needing something.

On Saturday I felt like I was the worst mother. Ellia is having some issues with fits, whining, and down right defiance. And I am at my wits end with it. And sadly I haven't been the best mom during these fits. I am very quick to get frustrated & yes, sometimes yell at her. Which of course, shocking, makes them worse! I also, really was feeling like I am easier on Addie & harder on Ellia. I have more grace with Addie than Ellia and sometimes over the exact same thing.

As I finished reading the book Last Song by Nicholas Sparks (great book!) there was a scripture that one of the characters mediated on. I immediately knew it was the scripture on the Fruits of the Spirit. So, that afternoon I picked up my Bible, sadly the first time in awhile, turned to that scripture and began reading it. I began to pray & to cry. Because I haven't been displaying those fruits to others, especially my daughter.

Lets back up & break apart the scripture:

In verse 19 it stated

"Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are:

adultery, fornication,uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry,

sorcery, hatred, contentions,

jealousness, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions,

dissensions, heresies, envy, murders,

drunkenness, revelries and the like:

of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in the past

that those who practice such things will not inherit the

kingdom of God"

Yikes, the ones that stood out to me the most were Outbursts of Wrath and dissensions. I decided right there & then to really try to re-memorize the verses 22-23 again.

vs 22-24 says:

"But the fruit of the Spirit is

Love, Joy, Peace, Long suffering, Kindness,

Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-Control.

Against such there is no law. And those who are

Christ's have crucified the flesh with it's passions and desires"

And in order to combat those areas of weakness I see in myself I must begin trying to display more Kindness, Long suffering (Patience), Gentleness and Self-control. And once again crucify the flesh that has reared its ugly head.

So as soon as I decided to really start putting this verse into practice, meditating on it & trying to change my ways I was confronted with an issue with a friend. The very next day!!! And of course I didn't recognize it as a Test. Today I am seeing it more clearly as a Test & am just trying to figure out how to proceed.

Test or no Test I am still hurt by the situation. I still feel like my friend has to admit to her share of the problem, should try to talk to me and mend things. And my I feel like my other friend & my hubby are taking her side. They both told me to give her grace, and I want too. But I feel like they are making excuses for her and trying to poo-poo it away. What happened to being an adult & accepting our responsibilities in things?

I am really, really trying to find the Grace, Kindness & Gentleness that I know the Lord wants me to show her. But it's HARD!!!

Things Ellia has been saying

Over the last few weeks Ellia has been talking more and more. And so much that now even Bill can understand her. (it used to be that I was the only one that knew what she was saying)

So I thought I'd compile a few things that she is saying:

"Addie I said you no play with my baby" - to which I reminded her, "That is Addie's baby"
"Well I burrow it now"


"Mama you too big for the tub" - said to me as she jumped in the tub with me the other night. And let me tell you that sure did wonders for my pregnant self esteem!!


"Mama I think Addie wants cookies"
She does
"Yes, she does"
Okay, then I will just give Addie some cookies
"Noooooo, I want them too"
Oh really, cause you said just Addie wanted cookies
"I meat we both"
Oh, okay you meant you both want cookies too. Gotcha


"Mama I not take a nap, I big girl & big girl not take naps today"
Ummm, I don't think so little one, you are taking a nap
"Ummmmm, just a minute..........she tilts her head OK I think so"



"ooooh bubba just licked my butt"
He did?
"Yes, I let him, he likes it"
Well, lets not let him do that anymore. And why are your panties & pants off anyways?
"Cause I wanted to let Bubba lick my butt"
That is not acceptable Ellia, please put your pants & undies back on right now.
"okay, mama"
"You mad mama?"
No, but I do not want Bubba licking your butt.
"That nasty"
Yes, that is nasty

Seen, Heard, Said Wednesday

Seen: Ellia dancing with her giant stuffed penguin. Holding the flippers and making it dance with her and go around and around in circles to "Ring around the roses"


Heard: That Ellia really likes to dance but Addie not so much. "And Addie especially doesn't like it when her sister drags her around making her dance." This was told to us by the Sunday school volunteers when we went to pick the girls up from class after church.


Said: "You must share Mama with YaYa" - Ellia telling me I have to share my tuna sandwich with her, after she had already eaten her own lunch. Guess this sharing thing has to be practiced by all of us.

Not Me Monday on Tuesday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This was created by MckMama, head on over to her blog to see what she and everyone else have NOT been doing this week! (Although, MckMama is in Kenya this week, so she might not be there for Not Me! Monday! But go there anyway to see all about her adventures in Kenya.)

I did NOT create a "honey to do list" for Bill this weekend since he was off for 3 days. He did NOT come close to getting the list complete.

He did NOT instead make 4 new duck calls thus resulting in a lot of time in the garage. He did NOT try to rationalize his actions by saying to me yesterday "I am trying to get good at this so I can start selling them"

Our sweet and angelic Ellia did NOT throw a tantrum/fit for 2+hrs on Sunday night. She did NOT wear herself out & finally fall asleep in her bed at 6:30. Bill and I were NOT exhausted ourselves and fall asleep by 9 o'clock.

I have NOT been craving a juicy steak for days and it was NOT all I could think about all week. So on Friday night when Bill called to see what was for dinner I did NOT beg & plead with him to take us out to dinner at Outback for steaks. He did NOT finally succumb to my pleading and we did NOT wait 30 Min's on a busy Friday night to have that juicy steak. The girls did NOT act up, spill food, scream, & just generally act crazy, NOT our girls. And I did NOT end up taking half the steak & potato home and I did NOT eat it for breakfast the next morning ...... cold.

My tummy is NOT so big that it is inhabiting me from now doing dishes. That's right folks, I am officially too big to do dishes.....NOT joking. This kid is sooo much out front that it hits the edge of the sink & if I have to bend in to get something out of the sink it pushes into my tummy. This never happened with the girls!!!

Friday Facts

Thankful for:
I am thankful for all the beautiful weather this week. The girls and I have played outside almost everyday. It has been so lovely.

Looking forward too: Bill being off the next 3 days in a row.

Whats for dinner tonight? I do not want to cook so I don't know. Bill suggested picking up a pizza on his way home. Sounds like what we might do.

Listening to: Rather reading - Reading my friends FB comments. After a few years they are finally adopting a baby! Such an answer to prayers. They were told they couldn't have any more children, they have one little girl who is 5. (They are young too) They came to Presentation Sunday 2yrs ago with us and started pursuing adoption. This week they got the call and today they picked up their little boy. I am soooo happy for the.

Missing: My reef flip flops. These are the BEST flip flops ever. They sell them at Nordstroms. Mine broke and Nordstrom gave me a gift card b/c they were out of stock of them. I am hoping they come in very soon cause I miss wearing them.

Wanting/Needing:
I am wanting / craving steak!! I mean a nice juicy steak and loaded potato. Forever it's been Mexican food but today I woke up just wanting to eat a big steak. And it's all I could think of today. Maybe we will pick up some steaks at Costco this weekend when we go shopping.

Seen, Heard, Said Wednesday

Seen: Ellia running around the house wearing not 1 but 2 ski hats on her head AND a cowboy hat over them.....let's just say her head was very wet from all the sweat when she finally removed them! And when I asked her if she need them all on she said " Yes, mommy they make me look pretty" - well okay then


Heard: Ellia singing in the back seat to my favorite worship CD. It's the sweetest thing to hear her say "Open the eyes of my heart Lord"


Said: "Addie please do not put your fingers in my belly button" - She is fascinated with pulling up my shirt now & rubbing my big belly.

And

I told Bill our friend's husband was getting snipped on Friday....as in no more children for them...and Ellia says "Snip, snip, snip" - We both busted up laughing...where does she come up with this stuff?

Not Me Monday - scrapbooking weekend style

What did I NOT do this week? What did others NOT do this week? Read my confessions and then head over to MckMama's to see what everyone else is NOT doing.


This weekend I did NOT go away for 3 days and 2 nights leaving my children with in-laws & hubby. And I was NOT super excited!!!!

I did NOT miss cooking, cleaning, laundry & changing diapers.

I did NOT eat chips, garlic dip with veggies, brownies, cookies, gummy bears, pizza, Cheetos and anything else I could get my hands on all weekend long. This was NOT after going to doctor for my 30week apt on Fri and finding out I had gained almost 5lbs in 2 weeks!! Guess after this weekend it will be another 5lbs.

One early morning this weekend I did NOT get up to go to the bathroom and walk past our cabin & I did NOT open the door to the cabin next door. Only to discover it was empty & not our cabin. Good thing there was no one in that cabin!

I did NOT say to all my friends that I thought I'd come home to a disaster of a house only to come home to a rather clean & put together house. And did I mention Bill also gave the girls baths too. I did NOT have to apologize to my husband for not giving him enough credit.

My husband did NOT offer to go get a pizza for dinner last night so I wouldn't have to cook & I did NOT turn him down and instead make Tacos for dinner.

I did NOT get into bed last night at 7:30 because I was so tired from our weekend.

It was a fun weekend & I am so glad that I have friends that I can hang with & have a good time.